both ready?

gargleblar · #1 (**permalink**) Top 11-07-2008, 05:55 AM

yehllow.
:]
me and my boyfriend have been together for half a year, and we both love each other so so much.
we are in a completely stable relationship (mentally and physically) , we trust each other completely and are certain we will last an extremely long time...
everything is pretty much perfect except for one thing,
my friend and her boyfriend had sex, and she wont shutup about it! and she txted my boyfriend saying 'i think you two should fuck!'
so we where txting each other that after-noon, and he told me what she had said.
i asked him what he thought, and
he had weighed up the pros and cons.
the only cons he could think of where
pregnancy
stds
people finding out (not likely)
making fools of our selves (but we would get over it.)

and all the pros where good good good bla bla bla.

and we had a huge disscusion on how far we should be going these days, and if we got carried away, protection, trust, what we both wanted.

the thing is when he was 7 he had sex, and he has really bad memories of it, and he's a christian, although he's not saying no. he just wants to be good about it.

i dont want to screw up....and hurt him or our relationship.
i told him it wasn't 'horny' sex, it was 'go to any extent to feel closer to you' sex. and he agreed.

the real problem is that now it's just hanging in the air! we came to a conclusion that if we wanted to at the time, if we where at that point we would! and i we didnt we would leave it. but...
i dont know.
every time i think about it my tummy cramps up from nerves...excited and worried.
im probably agonizing over nothing.
and i don't even really know what's wrong.
plus...i dont even know where to get started.
if we where to have sex, where to begin?
what to do...

but please help!
console me!
tell me of your experiences!
PLEASE!
tell me what to expect...
thankyou!

and i dont want any shit on us being too young, i wont listen to that. i know im not legal, but who gives a fuck? i certainly dont and i wont listen to anyone who thinks other wise.

minty2468 · #2 (**permalink**) Top 11-07-2008, 12:30 PM

hmm, tricky! you say that cathing an STI or STD (cnt remember) was a bad thing, possibly that is....well how many people has he had sex with apart from when he was 7? if not, you could always ask him to get checked?

sorry i cnt think of anything else on how to help you....you should try bringing it up again though, like casually , maybe he is a little nervous (im not implying you are young btw) but i mean who wouldnt be a tad nervous? i cant help but hink about you saying he had sex when he was 7? was it a very bad experience for him, like was it unexpected or did he intend to (i can imagine a 7 yr ol, at that time wanting to have sex?)

Mujahideen · #3 (**permalink**) Top 11-07-2008, 06:59 PM

He was seven years old when he first had sex? Then again, he is a christian, maybe the minister had something to do with it.

gargleblar · #4 (**permalink**) Top 11-07-2008, 09:18 PM

<i>
haha, crap.
he does say it was a bad decision...
it was with a girl his age (these things really do happen people)
and he regrets it.
i dont want to push it because he hates it.
you know when someones experienced something so bad there minds try to wipe it?
yerrr...
and im sure he didnt catch any stds.

jren207 · #5 (**permalink**) Top 12-07-2008, 12:26 AM

I find this seven thing odd.

TBJ · #6 (**permalink**) Top 12-07-2008, 07:59 PM

I find the 7 thing odd too. My lil brother is 8 and he doesnt even know what sex is! How the hell can a 7yr old decide to do it and know what to do?

I'd wait til u were legal before having sex, don't do it just because are.

Kier · #7 (**permalink**) Top 12-07-2008, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mujahideen

He was seven years old when he first had sex? Then again, he is a christian, maybe the minister had something to do with it.

lmfao...thats most likely why they dont women to join the church (or become bishops, not sure what it is) xD

iona_pixie · #8 (**permalink**) Top 12-07-2008, 08:10 PM

you should probably talk to him again about it being awkward now you've been discussing it, and how its hanging in the air, also tell him how you feel about not wanting to hurt him and see what he says. the 7 thing is quite ... O.o ... i kinda just feel sorry for him, what would two 7 yr old kids have been thinking that led them to having sex?!

if its really awkward, you may just decide to leave it until you're both more comfortable, but don't do it unless you are both entirely comfortable and aren't doing it for any other reasons, because it really won't be good!