I know ..

Pixie · #1 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 06:03 AM

I constantly go on about being hated..
blah blah blah..me me me..whine whine..annoy annoy.
And you probably want me to leave or whatever.

But right now..I just feel as if
nothings going right..and everythings a mess. [ i know thats a Avril lavinge song.]
I know I did a thread about this before, so I wont go back into detail.
But, my nans home on Tuesday..my mums kicked Chris out, my friends are no longer allowed it my house..because of Chris. My mums pure flipping out on me..and I really don't know how much I can cope.
Where on earth could there possibly be a silver lining?
I am getting threatened of being kicked out..
I have no life..I don't have anything to wake up for. I know people are far worst of than me...and I feel terrible for being so miserable. because I have it easy. probably but at the same time..I cant help it..I act all stupid, and try to be funny to cover it up. And I haven't sobbed for my nan yet..I cried two nights ago for my mum cause she was being a bitch. and Its like..am i going to cry? it sounds terrible but I keep forgetting shes not alive..So it hasn't sunk in. and I joke like about everything..I am a fucking idiot. so so so dumb. and Like where is my life going? I just dread everyday.
I really don't see the point. and I am even feeling guilty for posting this. because I will get hypocrites going on about how i should shut up about myself for once.
I don't even know who can make it better? Pf could..but I cant rely on her for everything and its probably pathetic relying on her..to pick me up when I fall..but in my life, theres no Bff..no special family member,
They're all two-faced bitched. I cant trust nobody. Not even myself these days.

Nobody will have read that. but if you did. sorry, ignore me.

Mandehlin · #2 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 07:19 AM

aww michelle, i feel really bad that you feel that way. Because you don't deserve it, no one does. Life is what you make it though, and I hope sooner than later, you'll realize what you want with life, and you'll come out a stronger person. I'm not very good with words (I used to be better when I thought a lot about life in general, wah wah).

I really hope things shape up around your house.

Pixie · #3 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 08:11 AM

its like...all at once..
you know? i try to get drunk tonight and forget about all this..but it's there as soon as i stepped through the door :/

Carly · #4 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 02:16 PM

Aww

Couldn't you move in with your dad for a few weeks until it's all settled down?

Pixie · #5 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 02:57 PM

Nope, he lives with my nan..so it's not his house.

Carly · #6 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 08:31 PM

Oh right thought you were at his and his gfs house or isit just hers?

Pixie · #7 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 08:36 PM

Just hers.

xPrincessx · #8 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 11:04 PM

I'm sorry you feel that way daughter. I didn't intentionally kick your brother out, plus I don't mind you having friends over..

srsly... problems can sometimes come one at a time, or all at once, tbh I'd prefer all at once and tackle them one by one, it will make you a stronger person, people grieve in different ways, so don't feel bad that you haven't cried for your nan yet.. My sister didn't cry when my dad died for 5 years.. all of a sudden, it just came out of no where... you'll cope someway or the other honey x

Pixie · #9 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 11:08 PM

ThankYou=] <3

xPrincessx · #10 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 11:19 PM

no problem

<3 anytime x

Pixie · #11 (**permalink**) Top 09-12-2007, 11:24 PM

I know that now :D

nicole2k8 · #12 (**permalink**) Top 12-02-2008, 04:18 PM

i fell so sorry for u everything is come at the same tiime just keep ur head up and smile i know the sound weir but just try it

figure8 · #13 (**permalink**) Top 13-02-2008, 12:53 PM

lol i fell so sorry