I miss him so much this time of year. Every fucking christmas is a constant reminder of how much I miss him... I remember sitting around the christmas tree and looking at him, he enjoyed christmas more than what me and my sister did and we were kids! His face lit up watching me and my sister open presents.. seeing how excited we got. I miss that so much. Now looking round the tree, it's as if we have to fake how happy we are. I fucking hate it. I wish we could cancel Christmas all together sometimes. Plus it's coming up for his 8 year anniversary and I can't bear it
